Is there any credibility to the saying “the grass is greener on the other side”?
In my experience this is most true. We all feel that we are missing something in life. Especially with social media nowadays.
For example let’s say that you go on a cruise to the Caribbean have a fantastic time. But then see on Facebook your cousin’s posts of her cruise through Europe. Suddenly your heart sinks. Yes, you loved your cruise, had a great time but suddenly you wonder why you didn’t think of going to Europe!
I think that happens in our relationships as well.
When I was married to my ex-alcoholic, drug user husband I wanted a relationship with someone that put me above everyone else. Someone that wanted to spend time with me and did not leave me at home while he would go out and have a great time, always without me.
Well…I found that person
I’ve been married to exactly the opposite of my ex-husband. And while it is an upgrade (think Honda to Cadillac kind of upgrade), I still wonder if the grass really is greener on the other side.
You see, I now feel suffocated!
I know, you may think that I am a stupid, disgraceful woman that does not appreciate a good man; oh wait, that’s what I tell myself!
Perhaps, and this is something that I do not tell others, only here do I feel free enough to write what’s in my heart because I am embarrassed and feel the judgment in my imaginary friend’s faces.
I love my husband dearly and he treats me well but he wants to spend every waking hour (away from his time at work) next to me. Even last night, we have a queen size bed but we might as well have a full size or even a twin size bed. He sleeps next to me most nights. So close his body heat makes me hot and gives me little space to move around.
I need my own space!
Also, I have girlfriends that I like to spend time with and have girl talk however anytime I mention it he makes that face. You know what face right? Showing me that he feels rejected, argh!!!
And trust me if I pay no mind and go grab a cup of coffee with a girlfriend (even at their house, in our same complex) after 30 minutes he will be texting me. I can expect texts like “when are you coming home”, “what’s for dinner, breakfast, etc.”, “do you want me to open up a bottle of wine”, and on and on.
It’s hard and I have no idea how to fix it.
If I find a solution to this issue I promise that I will come back and write it here. Meanwhile, I am grateful for my current life and while the grass is not greener on my past (that’s for sure). I do miss my freedom and ability to have a cup of coffee with someone without feeling guilty.
Till next time!
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